Saturday, February 09, 2008

Being Insulted By Your Own Interpretation!

I wrote:

"The other pool is staffed mainly by obese women of various ages. The obesity being a symptom of their unhappiness and also their attitude and bullying. However, there is still no excuse for their outrageous behaviour."

Both of the readers who commented on the above words, interpreted in such a way as to cause themselves offence. A little reading of my blog would reveal that I spent most of my life as a fat person. In understand what it is to be fat. I also understand how when we are sensitive about something, we can misunderstand words to the extent that we think we are being attacked when we are not.

Blogger Steph said...

Obesity is a symptom of unhappiness? I suppose it could be in some cases. You do know that there are other reasons for being obese? Before you lump all of us fat women in one category, I thought I'd chime in and defend myself, at least. I don't mean to upset you or belittle your feelings Colin, but your comments really made me feel crappy. I'm not over-weight by choice but because of medical reasons that happen to be beyond my control (my lymph and nervous systems were severely damaged in an auto accident and I also have fibromyalgia and digestive issues). I'm also not a bully or an unpleasant person either; if fact, I'm rather sensitive and consider other's feelings above and beyond my own in most cases. I'd never treat anyone poorly because of the way they look or the physical difficulty they're having (after all, I'm fat and disabled *smiles*). I live by the golden rule of treating others the way I want to be treated. I just wanted to let you know how I felt...
Steph from Ohio

aradiva said...

I have to agree with the last commenter about lumping all fat women together in one unhappy heap. You had a bad experience with some fat women, but believe me, the fat world is incredibly diverse. I was really taken aback by your stereotype, after having read your recent posts with interest.

4:15 AM, February 09, 2008



LizzieK8 said...

I am obese and I wasn't offended by the comment when originally made, Colin. I thought you were right on the mark with the obesity being an outward manifestation of their anger and behavior. Made sense to me.

And I don't feel you lumped all obese women into any category. You were discussing the obese women that staffed the pool.

Maggie said...

As a naturally slender/thin person I have been hassled by heavy set people, other women abut my weight/size. Yes, some are angry and bullies, but you didn't say all were, just those who you had serious reasons to be able to make some judgements about.
Some people have a lot of anger and use anyone they feel they can walk on as a 'whipping boy' and those women, who happen to be obese, were using you and probably other as such..and none of you deserve such treatment

Anonymous said...

I haven't been following this discussion, so might have missed the point.

However, one thing I do know and that is you can't blame your obesity on "lymph" problems, or a "thyroid condition" or some motor accident, or anything else. Those things may contribute to it, perhaps, in a round about way, but you do not get fat from that.

The things that make us fat are the things you shove into the body. And there is only one way it can go in... through a small hole in the face. It's a small hole, easily controlled. Did anyone ever think about closing it sometimes? That may just help, don't you think?? Let's try that, shall we?