Friday, May 15, 2009

I DON'T GET IT

I really don't get why people choose to be spiteful. I have experienced it more than once, always from women, and always via knitting lists. The attacks and lies have sometimes been really vile. It just happened again because someone didn't like a response of mine. Or rather that was the excuse they needed in order to lay into me.

It happened on a UK hand knitting list a couple of years back. That list is now almost dead because it was populated by so much spite. The things I was accused of! Yet a quick perusal of my emails in the archives would have shown them to be false. Just the same as this latest outburst.

I have an idea what may be behind these attacks but don't feel it would be appropriate for me to express them.

Oh I am well aware that people often lash out at others with accusations that are more apt for themselves. I am well aware that people don't usually look in the mirror to see the problem.

Even so, it still unsettles me when being the butt of such an attack.

14 comments:

Iris said...

Persnickity Dickens on them. I made the mistake of disagreeing with a lady on Ravelry and she went ballistic. Then, she wanted a public apology when I wasn't even "dissing" her to begin with. A conciliatory message to her wasn't acceptable. Oh, and she wanted this public apology in spite of the fact the group had been told NOT to discuss this issue any further.

It's interesting that your friends and followers are women, but that women are also the craziest when it comes to being bitter and nasty. I don't get it.

Siani said...

Sadly, some people are just made that way. Perhaps they're jealous of your knitting skills? BTW, thanks to you and your blog, I've just started knitting my own socks. I'd never tried it before, as I was terrified of knitting with dpns. Now, I love it, and prefer knitting in the round, to straight knitting. So, I'd like to say a big thank you, for inspiring me.

fairy godmother said...

I'm sorry that someone is giving you a hard time. Sad that some people choose to spend their time attacking insteading of helping!

Anonymous said...

Well I just wanted to say that I find your comments are just fab, helped me last night thank you.....

marilyn said...

Nasty cow!
My dear old granny had a wonderful expression for people like this...they are "not fully buttoned up" !
They are poor sad gits..no friends, no life, and no wonder.
I give my time and space in my head and my life to kind people, and ignore the others.
You have the love, gentleness and respect of so many folk; you don't need to listen to the rabid ramblings of others.
I am so glad the evening went well; sorry that I couldn't make it.
Speak soon
lots of love to you and John
Marilyn xx

Anonymous said...

There is a reason most of my best friends are gay men...

Macy from Buffalo, NY said...

"no friends, no life, and no wonder" - Great summary, Marilyn!

Colin, ignore the cows. They moo to hear themselves because to them they sound better than anyone else. They are better left to themselves.

You are a straightforward honest person and have every right to be heard. Your socks speak for your knitting knowledge, ESPECIALLY on a socknitting list, for heaven's sake! I enjoy every comment and post of yours and they can go and untangle some yarn in a corner somewhere.

Knitting-twitter said...

I think, most of the time its women just being jealous. Many have problems to accept that others are simply better with what they do.
Instead of learning from others they put them down to feel good but are they really feel good??

Yarnhog said...

Colin, if you'll forgive me, I'll tell you what I tell my children (and myself): There will always be people who like you, for reasons that have nothing to do with you, and there will always be people who don't like you, for reasons that have nothing to do with you. Don't give any of them too much importance.

Nan said...

I've never understood it either. There is no upside to it, except perhaps pathetic people feeling better about their putrid selves by putting someone else down.

And it isn't just the women. I recently had someone go after me full on. When I discussed it with my spiritual director (wondering what I might have done to bring that on), she said "projection". And told me that it had absolutely nothing to do with me. I think that you are encountering the same thing.

Bullies will be bullies and, unfortunately, the internet has enabled those folks to snipe more easily from cover.

Georgina (remote knitter) said...

Sorry this has happened to you Colin - People can be so heartless, especially when hiding behind the screen of the Wonderweb!
Just scrolling your site I see we have a Singapore childhood in common and you share your birthday with my son!!!!

karrol said...

only our precious animals never say hurting words,you are loved by many,do not cast your pearls among swine,and just consider that some people are not kind.
ignore the ignorance let love rule!you friend ,karrol

Claudia said...

I've never understood why these things happen. I guess people are too bored with their lives and have to generate drama. What a shame.

FuguesStateKnits said...

Some of us here in the States would say this lady was "one fry short of a Happy Meal:)"

Laughter will get 'em every time!
Hugs,
Joan