WINDFALL

Life can be very strange as I am sure you know.

My mood has been somewhat low recently. I haven't really understood why. Especially when everything in my life seems to be going so well.  Tonight my closest friend  suggested that it is precisely because everything is going so well and really good things are happening is why my mood has taken the plunge. She says because I am just not used to life being this good and my old tapes are always that things go from bad to worse.  Anyway, I am feeling much better.

There are major changes  going on right now.  First of all we have come into a very large sum of money which we were not expecting.  We have considered buying a bungalow which we could do tomorrow and still keep this house.  However, we have been very happy in this house and we have good neighbours. So we think we shall be making more alterations to this house than just the conservatory we have already booked.

We will have the kitchen totally remodelled and we will either have a double sink or one big enough to bath the dogs in.  We shall also have a Stannah chair lift put in and turn the bathroom into a shower room.  We will also turn the outside sheds,  which have a fully plumbed toilet,  into part of the house.  They are already made of brick. 

 We will have the whole house carpeted top to bottom and also redecorated throughout.  I will finally bite the bullet and get rid of almost all of my knitting machines and everything that goes with them.  I have to face facts that I cannot really put them too much use myself now.  It takes me a long while to knit just one sweater.  I will not however leave myself without at least one machine.

 Even after doing all this to the house we could still go out and buy another house!  So we are pretty much set for life.  My fears about the quality of life dropping considerably once John retired have now gone and in fact our quality of life will be greater!

 It feels very strange to be writing about such good things happening to ME.  This is the sort of thing that happens to other people.  I have always been very aware of how fortunate I have been to have survived what I have survived.  This, however is way way beyond my expectations which were very few. I just wanted to not feel bad all the time.  I never thought or dreamt about feeling good.  I just wanted to be numb.

 Now most of you reading this will no that I have serious physical pain 24/7 and you therefore may be surprised at the above paragraph.  Don't be. This sort of pain is nothing in comparison to the psychic pain that was my life for so many years.

 It feels very strange to look at a 5 bedroomed bungalow, which I did do today, and know that I could pay for it cash if I so chose to.  I do think though that I have made the right decision, along with John of course, to get this house the way we would like it to be and use the rest of the money for security and living well.

 I do agree with those people that have suggested that my day at Crufts really took a lot out of me.  I had not been to a dog show since last September and so to make my 1st show Cruft's was a big deal! 

 I also came to realise a few things about showing dogs, especially my breed which are usually such late maturers.  Elizabeth  who won BIS at Cruft's,  is 7 years old!  I was very lucky that Whitney became a champion by the age of 18 months and was retired before she was 3!  I realise that this is not usual and that I must bear in mind that the timescale for Mary Grace and any other dog that  I show will be longer. 

 Touch wood, at the moment Chase  looks to be exactly what I was hoping for and I am excited about showing him.  He has not got his 2nd set of teeth yet and we just have to sweat it out until he does because the teeth could make or break him!  Other than that he is a beautiful dog who is very well made and with the most delightful personality.  His jaw at present is perfect  and what I would expect it to be before the 2nd teeth come in.  He is now 4 months old and during the next 8 weeks I will know the answer as to what his bite will be!  This is a very difficult breed when it comes to bites.