No matter how I try and prepare myself each year I always end up feeling down at this time. It is my birthday on Thursday and the end of the following week Christmas.
Neither fills me with cheer. I know my life is very different now to what it was and I am very grateful for that. Yet, I fail to not be overwhelmed by bad memories and feelings of loss at this time.
There is little else I can say apart from role on the New Year! I am the world can get back to normal. I will no longer have the fact that I don’t have a family and never had a loving one rubbed in my face.
Yes, I have the man that I love the last 30 years, I have my dogs, I have a good life. None of which obliterates the past and maybe I should stop thinking it will.