Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Gone For Good

It seems to me that, in general, people do not get what abuse does to a child.

Not only that, they don't realise that the damage is permanent.


When a child is abused, his or her sense of innocence is gone for good.

When a child is abused, his or her sense of security is gone for good.

When a child is abused, his or her childhood is gone for good.

When a child is not loved their sense of wholeness is gone for good.

It is not something that can be altered, changed, or lessened.

No.

The effects can be lived with and lived with well.


The hole remains.


Added:And hopefully sometime in your life, you accept what happened, and recognize you were a child and not in control. It was not your fault, but the fault of the abuser(s).

Oh the years I've missed in not learning that. May my remaining ones be better for the learning.

I agree completely with the person who wrote this in the comments section.

My point is that no matter what the work done on oneself, no matter how one understands that abuse is never the victims fault, some things cannot be undone.

Put in another way: say someone chops off your leg.

You can come to terms with it.

You can learn to live very well with just one leg.

You can even get a prosthetic leg.

You can forgive the chopper.

You can fully understand that the chopping off of your leg was not your fault.

However, you are still minus a leg!

And you will never, ever, not ever, be the person you might have been with two legs.

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