EDINBURGH

We have just got in from our trip to Edinburgh. We were there from Saturday till today. Had an excellent time. I will post pictures over the next few days.

The house is freezing and of course devoid of dogs so it feels very odd. We will collect the dogs tomorrow morning.

Probably paranoid but since we were burgled when we went to Budapest, I just decided to not write anything here or on Facebook or Twitter.

BLAMING THE VICTIM

I am getting really fed up with the remarks about me writing on my blog about my holiday. This is NOT why we were burgled. It is NOT my fault! Who reading my blog, apart from friends, knows where our home is?

Why when something happens to a person is there always this subtle blame the victim thing ?

Writing on my blog is just that. It isn't an open invitation to rob me nor is it to be used by anyone to blame me for anything that may befall me.

Are you really so scared of misfortune that you must simply the blame the person that misfortune befalls in order to make you feel safer?

EDIT: It wasn't so much a comment on here that had me snap. Quite a few people have said it and it has been the first thing they said. I told both sets of neighbours we were away and no dog sin the house. Normal to do so. We were robbed and clearly by people who knew we were away and no dogs were in the house. It has nothing to do with what i said, wrote or thought. Nothing to do with me whatever. Bad stuff happens. One gets a similar response when one tells of someone dying of cancer (an acquaintance just has) and people always ask 'did they smoke?'. Or if a gay man dies 'did he have AIDS? They do this because if they can blame the death on something the person who died did, it makes them feel safer, like they won;t die if they are good. It's that old lie of if we are good nothing bad will happen. So I believe unintentionally people look for reasons to blame the victim in order to themselves feel better and less fearful and it hurts those on the receiving end.

NOT BRILLIANT

I have yet to deal with the holiday photographs. All 360 of them. I have yet to deal with anything much. I left the house for the first time this evening, briefly. Other than that I have only been to the Doctor. I feel unsettled and unsafe and somewhat angry. This place has felt like home and secure. Now it doesn't. It's worse knowing that someone close by screwed us over and is friendly to our face. When I took the pups out earlier, I suspected everyone I saw and did not smile or greet anyone. I now feel I want to move whereas before this we both felt this would be our last home. I have had much more pain today and have had several acid attacks.

I am getting up early and going for my swim tomorrow. And the next day. Probably unable to Friday and Sunday and Monday due to Easter.

GOOD FORTUNE

We are home.

More stuff was taken than we thought, which is not really surprising. A Minolta camera 35 mm, no lenses! A 30gb Ipod. Thankfully I had taken the 160 gb Ipod with us. The Ipod docking thing.

On the good side we were incredibly lucky. We managed to get the exact same tv model, now not made, the exact pc screen (okay the surround is white rather than my preferred black although having said that, this one doe snot have a reflective edge cos of the white).

It made us laugh to realise they had also stolen the Dyson full of dog hair! We got a better version which had a third off the price!

Have to deal with insurance etc on Monday. Have to speak with Police again to inform them of what else we foudn missing.

John's drawers were gone thru, not mine, yet mine are closer to the door.

We also got a bill from a company who were called out by the Police but then cancelled within a very short time and they expect us to pay £180! What planet do they live on?

It is clear that the thieves left through the front, round the side, through our passageway as they cleared it of our junk in order for them to get out. Thus their vehicle must have been parked outside. The whole thing seems very suspicious. If they were heard by neighbour, as we have been told, and she called the police, why did our neighbour, or anyone else, not see them leaving with all our stuff? Mmmmmm.....

The dogs are delighted to be home and us to have them home. Whitney did not eat well whilst away and has lost weight which she will gain back now she is back with her man. Margaret will be returning James, Carly and Little Dorrit to us tomorrow.

One of our friends, Marilyn did a really nice thing. There was a welcome home card waiting for us when we returned today.

HEIDELBERG TO PANAMA

Lia, John, Diana, Daniel and I went into Sandhausen, had a coffee and also a quickish look around the local yarn shop which is very good. Yes, I bought a little yarn.

Later we went to Heidelberg minus Lia. Had a good time. Sunny day. Bought a hat.

We will leave after another good meal cooked by Lui as we have a very long drive of 450 miles tomorow to Calais. We will sleep there tomorow night and Friday and we will cross the Channel to drive back home on Saturday morning.

This has been a very good trip. I am apprehensive about getting home becasue of the burglary although quite why I am not sure. I kow it really bothers me that someone we know did this to us and that makes me feel unsafe in a place I have always felt safe in.

NEW LEGS PLEASE

Budapest has some beautiful buildings. It has wide avenues. Lots of artwork and statues.

As I mentioned on Twitter, it is not accessible so Daniel had to be left in our room. Everywhere we have been today would not have been possible with Daniel.

Sadly, the recession has clearly left it's mark here. Many closed and baorded up shops. The whole place has a forlorn look and feel to it. At least where we have been here in Pest and Vici Utca. Lots of souvenir shops selling the usual tat.

I bought a traditonal shirt which is really nice. The only one in my size. Mostly the tradional cltohing is for women and obviously so.

I have not found any yarn shops.

I also bought a womnderful hand made leather coin carrying pouch. It clips onto my belt loop and has a really cool metal closing hook. I also bought too cups I liked. It seems I have a collection of coffee cups now as I often look for them and buy what I like the look of. I at one time thought it was wasteful until I realised that having beautiful things is a necessary part of life.

I discovered that pain killer sor not, my legs give way all together after a while and the pills don't stop the pain as much as I owuld like. I have to walk very slowly which I now is hard on John and his long legs which make him 6ft 1 " tall. He never complains.

It is really cold here. Sunny all day today. I wore 40 denier pantyhose, long johns, a thermal base layer oin top of those and jeans. Oh an d my wool socks. I was warm enough. I alos wore 4 layers on top. I wore my Stetson and heavy jacket. Even through all that my legs could feel the chill but not so much it bothered me. I wore my red croc DM's. People stared me a lot today and I even had my photogrpah takken twice. I dont'know why. I noticed that peopel didný just look cos of the boots but the caot and hat too. I thought I looked tame. Lord knows wht'll happen tomorrow when i wear my balc DM's covered in flowers!

I saw lots of real fur coats on women and we also saw a few real fur shops. I have to say they were just beautiful despite all the ethical concerns surrounding this.

Tomorrow we shall probably go into Buda (across the river) and at some point tomorrow or the next day we shall take a boat along the Danube. Either as a tour or to the next town along the Danube.

I have been successful at enjoying this, as has John judgunbg from his mood. My stomach lurches everytime I think about the house, otheriwse it is okay.

We have been burgled twice before, not at the house. Once 25 years ago and a litter of unweaned puppies were stolen. That was awful. truly awful. The second time was in 99 at the flat an donly material goods went.

We will have to secure the house if I am ever to leave it again. We will talk to the police when we get back and discuss the best way to do this.

SPANNER IN THE WORKS

We arrived at our hotel in Budapest. It is very nice. The weather here is bitterly cold!

Okay, we got some bad news. Gail, a good friend called to say that we have been burgled. It was done very soon after we left and Gail had been pondering whether or not to tell us. I am glad she did. I wasn't at first but I wasn't thinking clearly. John is very upset about this. This sort of thing panics him. I muts say my reaction was to need to go to the loo very fast. At least I don't feel bloated now.

Anyway, Gail was able to go back to my house and it seems only the TV and my PC monitor were taken. Thank fully niether of my pc towers were removed. So Gail has taken those and the blu ray dvd palyer to her home. I cancelled the cards we left at home as no way of knowing if they were nicked too.

At first I felt intense fear amd so did John and John wanted to go home. I don't think he does now. Trouble is it would take at least 3 days to get back now and I can't do it after drivng the 1350 miles here(house to hotel). Also there is little point. The police and forensics have been and secured the house it seems.

My problem is going to be safety. I have always felt safe in that house. I now don't. I also have suspicions. Someone we know has done this, someone who knew we were going away and no dogs were in the house. This wasn't anyone taking a chance. This was someone who knew there wopuld be no dogs. This makes me feel sick.

My fear has abated. The dogs and we are fine. Only material goods taken. My biggest fear was that my pc's were taken. They are really very personal to me. I have all my photographs on them, my designs. I have no idea if my storage devices were taken or not.

Obviously we will have some serious securing to do when we get home. And I must take steps to secure my personal pc stuff. How I am not sure. The thought of losing all that, my writing, my dog pictures etc is not a happy thought at all. It feels to me like they contian my life. Oh I know I can always get a new one and be online but I can't replace the photgraphs and writings and emails I found special etc.

I need to go now but the hotel has pc access so I can update easily.