Showing posts with label gay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gay. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

GAY ENOUGH TO MARRY

July 7th this year is our 31st anniversary. We met, I went to his home and never left. It was love at first sight. It was Tuesday July 7th 1981, early evening.

We are to marry at Ely Registry Office at 3pm on Saturday July 7th 2012.

When we first met we never dreamed that would happen. There was an awful lot of hatred for us from the Religious Right and the Church in those days which only got worse. We wondered if we'd get old or be in camps by now like during WWII. There was talk of this when HIV firs hit. MP's suggested we all be interned in camps and put on an island somewhere.

Yet instead we are to marry. Whilst it is called a Civil Partnership, the present Conservative Prime Minister has stated that it will become full marriage with all the same rights. Right now we will have financial and next of kin security which is all we want. We don't want anyone to interfere medically with either of us and should John die, I will receive his pension just as a wife would. All our legal documents will state we are legally a couple.

There are some gay people against this. I don't accept their arguments as to why and strongly object to them trying to do to us what str8's have done to us always! They seem to think we are not gay enough and want to be 'pretend' str8's. How puerile! No it's about security and being legally recognised. I don't give a toss what anyone else accepts or doesn't. As for not being gay enough, I cannot think of anything more radical than living an ordinary life right in the midst of all the str8's, not needing to live in a gay ghetto in  order to feel validated.

Now what to wear? Will I be seated in Daniel? Or will I be stood up on my sticks? Subdued clothing or all out dog show outfit? Crumbs, only 6 months to get ready!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

COGENT INDEED

I did not write the following. I also was unable to ask permission of the man who wrote this Facebook as his account has been set so that it is impossible to make contact. I therefore will not add his name, just his words which I find profound and is just how I feel about all those who have protested to me how they don’t ‘hate’.

 

To start my reply, let me say a little about myself as background. First, I am a man who is a progressive evangelical Christian. Second, I happen to be gay. Third, before I accepted myself as gay and finally came out, I spent more than eigh...t years as a leader and as a participant in the ex-gay movement where I tried to change my sexual orientation and assist others in changing theirs. I left the movement in much pain after I realized it did not work for me or for others, and, indeed, caused all of us more harm than good. Fourth, I am a person who for years has studied Christian theology, ethics, comparative religion, fundamentalisms in various religions, fundamentalist and evangelical Christianity, as well as Christianity in a variety of other contexts. Fifth, I am a student of global human and civil rights and a human and civil rights advocate and activist. Given all of these things, might I suggest the following to those other Christians who have chosen to take offense (it is always a choice we make to let ourselves be offended) at an all-inclusive statement about Christians being at war with gays?
First, why are you so offended? We as humans tend to be most angry and offended at those things that point a finger back at us in some way. Perhaps there is more truth to Anne's statement than most Christians care to admit about Christians being at war with gays. If not, what really irks you about this statement?
Second, if anyone who is a Christian is offended, I ask that same person of faith the following question: What are you and other Christians in your sphere of influence doing to educate and advocate for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people around the world who suffer at the hands of religious people today? No one can deny the centuries of persecution of people presumed to be homosexuals in Christian culture by people who were Christians. But what are Christians doing in America today to help the more than two million homeless youth on our streets, of whom at least 25 to 40 percent are estimated by experts to be gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender? What are you doing to help prevent bullying of kids in your church youth group or at your local schools over issues of PERCEIVED sexual orientation? What has your church done in response to the rash of recent publicized suicides by gay teens and young adults, many of whom were bullied? What are Christian churches doing to help prevent teen suicide by gay and lesbian teenagers who feel hopeless because of the constant harassment and belittling they suffer at the hands of others, who often profess to be people of faith (and in America that usually means that they are Christians)?
How easily we Christians want to forget the sad history of the Christian church toward Jews, homosexuals, women, children, and anyone else who did not fit into the norm. More people than we can count have been tortured and killed in the name of Jesus Christ, and many because they were presumed to be homosexual. How easily we forget that the very word "faggot" comes from the practice of tying homosexual men together like a faggot of sticks and burning them before God to purify the community of the evil of homosexuality in Christian England.
Sadly, what Anne proclaims about Christians being at war with gays has more truth to it than most Christians care to admit. As one who has studied theology, church history, current politics and church polity of various denominations, I have to say that even today there are, indeed, significant parts of the Christian church that are, in fact, at war with gay people in spiritual, psychological and, in some cases, far more literal ways. That is not to say that all Christians hate gay people, or that even most Christians do. But most Christians in the United States are complicit in causing the suffering of gay people around the world because they remain silent and do nothing to stop other Christians from doing evil in the name of Christ. They do not ally themselves with gay people, as Jesus would. They do not stand up for those whom many would consider the least in society (Matthew 25). In many countries of the world today, gay people are worse than lepers. While this is not usually the case in the United States or most other industrialized countries, it certainly is true in lesser-developed areas of the world where the Christian church plays a more central role, such as Africa. In Uganda a law is almost certain to pass in coming weeks, thanks to hateful Christians, who were inspired by American Christian ex-gay ministry leaders who visited Uganda in 2009. Most of the Christian churches in Uganda seem to support the so-called “kill the gays” bill, which requires long, if not life-long, prison sentences for homosexuals and, in some cases, mandates the death penalty for homosexuals and people living with HIV.
In conclusion, I wish that, before other Christians got upset over and proclaimed how offensive it is to be told that Christians are at war with gays, they instead got concerned over what really is happening to gay people in their own communities and around the world and did something to help stop the suffering. Instead of getting irked when they are lumped together with others because of the legacy of the Christian church to date with respect to gay people, Christians in America need to remember that it is largely Christians who are advocating to keep Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, and it was largely Christians and other people of faith who fought to get Proposition 8 passed and who are fighting to support it now. I wish that, for once, my evangelical Christian and Roman Catholic brothers and sisters would walk in the shoes of their gay brothers and sisters for even a day. If you do not think that Christians are at war with gays, I dare you to walk into a Christian church and tell the pastor that you are gay and see what happens. I challenge you to consider what it must be like to be a gay person in Uganda, a very Christian nation that is intent on "killing the gays," by the admission of many of its many Christian leaders. Then try educating others in your church about what Christians are doing to gay people in Uganda and see how quickly you are silenced in the name of Christ.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

ANON'S ATTITUDE KILLS

CARL WALKER HOOVER

Click on the link above. This is about an 11 year old boy who hung himself when he could not endure the bullying any more.

He was not considered 'normal' and no one at his school thought anti gay bullying should be addressed.

You may not realise it Anonymous but you and all who think like you allowed this to happen, allowed the bullying to happen, allowed this boy to be hounded to his death at the age of 11.

Every time a gay person, who one perceived to be, is bullied or killed, every time a person of colour is abused or killed, every time a woman is abused or killed , or a child is abused or killed, ALL those people, regardless of their actions or non action, who think that gay people, people of colour, women and children are LESS than, are responsible. Why? Because you give fertiliser to the growth of hatred.

Personal Responsibility has much wider ramifications than we like to think.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

OH DEAR AGAIN...

Perhaps someone else is more able than to explain why this comment is so full of bigotry and offence. I don't get people like this, who blithely continue to insist they are neither bigots nor offensive, despite all evidence to the contrary. I am stumped for words here, or maybe I just can't be bothered cos I feel it would be waste of time trying to educate a closed mind.

I am disappointed. I just wanted to know the reasons why non heteros feel they need to find labels for themselves all the time. Why do you all feel the need to "come out", explain (and defend) your orientation? I have never had trouble accepting non heteros, my brother in law is one, has never had to "come out", as we always accepted him for what he was. He lives with a lovely partner and we regularly socialise with him and his friends, all of whom have accepted what they are without feeling the need to explain, label, demand equality or anything else. I love these people for that very reason. We meet on an equal basis, sexually, mentally, socially and any other way.


Sorry Susan, but you judged me, you are all judging me. I wanted to non personalise the discussion, being as it was about words/labels, not whether people are/are not gay or whatever. Will it make any difference to know who I am? Are my views any the less legitimate?

As for "marriages", the marriage ceremony clearly states (among other things) it is an institution first ordained for the procreation of children to be brought up in a Christian environment. As the Church still sees homosexuality as illegal, why can't gays just accept that, instead of trying to turn everything on its head for their benefit? Most people have absolutely no problems with civil partnerships or unions, which takes out the religious complications anyway.

If I accept you as gay, why can't you accept me as normal - why does using this label for myself immediately mark me out to be a bigot?

I am not being bigoted, biased, against you or anything, I just really find it difficult to understand why you can't live life without making so many issues out of things. I really feel very sad for you at times (and please don't take this as me being patronising or anything, feeling sad for someone is a perfectly legitimate human emotion!)

I remain,
Anon.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Oh Dear!!!

ANONYMOUS left the following comment to the 'Oh That's Okay Then ' post:

But many people object to the fact that the word "gay" has now been taken on board by that fraternity, having totally lost its original meaning. Why was the word gay adopted in the first place as it bears no relation to its true meaning??
Why not just use homosexual? Calling myself "normal" is deemed as offensive to those of a non-normal disposition, so I have to describe myself as hetero.

Why would anyone object to the use of a word that is not offensive? In fact it is G.A.Y. , an acronym meaning Good As You.

You write as if you have a problem with us and your use of the word 'normal' suggests you don't see us as being of equal value , especially when you describe as non-normal. Given a little thought one could easily realise why that is offensive, if one cared enough for others to think it through. There are more of us than people with red hair . Are they too 'non-normals'? Thankfully, by your definition, I am not normal. I cringe at the thought, if your thinking is a representative example of 'normal' thinking.

Homosexual, btw, is perfectly fine. And whilst you might be right to call yourself heterosexual, I doubt very much that you ever are in a situation when you have to, unless you frequent gay bars. And you certainly do not HAVE to at all, as what you are is clear.

Monday, April 13, 2009

OH, THAT'S OKAY THEN!

I think I have mentioned here before that I object to the term 'queer' to describe gay people. I was lambasted elsewhere for my objection. Yes, castigated by own kind and rejected for not thinking the same as them. One justification for attacking me personally as being stupid was that 'academia' use the term, in that there is such a thing as 'Queer Studies'. I kid you not. How offensive is that!?

Imagine these academic courses:

Nigger History

Kike Cooking

Rug Munching for The Over 50's

Reading for Retards

Fashion for Spastics

Bull Dykes and Feminism

Advanced Shirt Lifting

Fashion For Cross Dressing Perverts

Physics for Faggots

Poofs and The Bible

Or why not a tv show, Nancy Eye for the Str8 Guy ?

I don't suppose they will get it whilst they are too busy being 'right on' and disenfranchising the likes of me for daring to object to having my dignity swiped by my own kind.