tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14603206.post2764235499193668915..comments2023-04-28T10:53:10.258+01:00Comments on KNITMAN: NO REGRETSAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14864658805462324550noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14603206.post-27938348160759415132013-04-20T19:47:38.054+01:002013-04-20T19:47:38.054+01:00As always, Colin, an interesting post. I too have...As always, Colin, an interesting post. I too have felt fear when things are going well after struggling to get through life alone and with difficulty. Some years ago, I made a decision to cut myself off from everything and everybody that did or had caused me pain, which was basically my family. I haven't spoken to any of them in around 30yrs and don't regret a minute of it. I'm sure they felt the same way about me but hey, it's all good.<br />Interestingly, our mother (that doesn't easily roll off my tongue!)died on 2nd April, which I found very traumatic, not that she had died but because I thought she was going to hang on until the 6th or 7th April, which is my daughters anniversary. I actually made myself quite ill over it and my depression descended on me like a vat of thick treacle which not only was too difficult to escape from but I didn't even want to try, especially as our father died on her 16th birthday!! Anyway, she hung on until 2nd April and was cremated on Wednesday. Now nobody informed me of her demise nor of the funeral date, although I found out by other means, but today, I find out that the discussion in the 'first car' centered around where was I?? Apparently, they all expected me to turn up after everything...but I'm no hypocrite.<br />Anyway, I just thought I would share that with you because your post triggered those thoughts in me and somewhere in there, I was also remembering how scared I was of life and just about everything else. Parents dying is a natural process but when you lose a child, that process is suddenly changed and everything is in the wrong place. Forgive me if none of this makes sense to you, but somehow, your post made me relive my fear as well. xx<br />midnightvelvethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12593572003440816742noreply@blogger.com